Note to archivist: This information
was found on a POD personal storage device in the rubble of a demolished
apartment building in Long Island City, Brooklyn on
July 9th, 2087.
1
June 23rd,
2042: I had decided to take the day off from my
restaurant job as a sous chef to enjoy my favorite things about the city. I
walked down the Long Island Expressway into Brooklyn
and stopped at Sweetleaf for a cup of coffee. I sipped on my iced coffee which
was sweating worse than I was. I stopped at PS1 where the guard told me I
couldn’t have my drink. I looked him in the eyes as I gulped it down and threw
it in the trash. Inside the museum, photos of naked women with frightened looks
stared at me, and I felt unmoved. Various electronic art installations hummed and flashed
blue frames on the walls.
I
walked through Bushwick, Greenpoint, and into Williamsburg which was now nothing more than
a Manhattan-esque commercial center that tourists felt brave for visiting. I
still loved Bedford Ave.
despite the fact that families from Kansas, Nebraska, and Bum-Fuck
wherever else liked to stare at kids with tattoos, partially shaved
heads and backless shirts like they were in a zoo. The kids never stared back
or acknowledged that the families existed.
I
went into my favorite restaurant, Wild Ginger, a vegan pan-Asian place that had
the best gyoza I’d ever tasted. I couldn’t help but notice my waitress and
wonder if she was smiling at me for her job or because she wanted to. She
looked like the kind of girl who only did exactly what she wanted to. She had
wide hips, wild brown hair that lay on her back in loose curls. She was wearing
big glasses and had a tattoo of a pigeon on the inside of her arm. I didn’t
stare, but I smiled for what felt like the first time all day.
It
was important for me to keep my wits about me today. The sun was setting now
and in less than 6 hours BlackNet was going to open up a prison where our founder
was being detained and seize complete control of the internet from the
government.
It seems to me that this was a “calm before the storm” short story. It’s a good first part of what ultimately has to be judged as an incomplete for now since this seems to be a project in which the larger sum (i.e. the entire project), will be more interesting than the individual parts. This is not necessarily a bad thing, however it’s also not a good thing either in the sense that many of the parts won’t be able to stand on their own as single pieces.
ReplyDeleteOn the positive side, there’s the details the story gives. Stories about going to a gallery show about naked women, or the fascination New York City tourists have about Brooklyn are stories that are never going to get old, as long as the there’s an interesting spin and enough detail to give a mental image what the text is trying to say. However, on this front, there’s nothing out of the ordinary that suggests an actual relation between the first paragraphs and the final paragraph that is trying to jettison the story forward.
On the plus side, the mood created by the photo of the dark subway line is something to be praised. The New York City Subway is one of those train systems that easily shows up on the nightmares of many people, and the photo, which I assume was lightly altered showcases the idea of a city that has been left behind and which feels to be related to the last paragraph in a more nuanced way than the text did. It goes the same for the wallpaper, which seems to have post-apocalyptic queues (It looks like it was taken out of one of those disaster movies)
Overall good start for the blog and hopefully once it’s complete, we’ll be able to see more clearer vision of what this story is about.